Saturday, December 15, 2007

Doctor Boom...

...or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Defiler...

...a/k/a Fugie Gets pwned...

...or 12 Scenes From My Basement

I fell asleep thinking about this story and how to tell it. I woke up thinking about this story and how to tell it. I've occasionally had a nice play story to tell at the end of a long tournament, but I am invariably amazed at the Magic players who can recall incredible bad beat or shocking win stories and every detail thereof from years previous. Last night, I experienced my own story and now I know. I'll warn you now, this isn't an unbelievable comeback story. It's a you played that?!? and won story. The problem is where to begin. How about the beginning?

(1) In the beginning, there was darkness...wait! Wrong beginning. So we had 9 last night for the draft. Fugie won with treefolk. Do not disrespect the treefolk. They are good. Except when they're not. I went 2-2 with a mediocre Faeries/Merfolk hybrid that just didn't work quite right. Eh. 2-2 is all right, though I doubt the other authors of this blog would agree with me.

(2)I got up from my chair, darted into the other side of the basement, popped out in the middle, took off all the way to the other end, slammed the door down there, sprinted back to the table, through the closest door and windmill slammed-

(3)"Dude, come here. You have to see this." I handed TooSarcastic the lands in front of me. "Count these."

1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12

Then I showed him my hand. Jokulhaups in front and laughter behind.

(4)Fugie, Major Luck and I start an EDH in between rounds. I win that with Herald of Leshrac. We decide to do one more after the draft is over. My general is Wort, Boggart Auntie. Fugie has Dakkon Blackblade. Major Luck was peeved at Fugie for shotgunning Dakkon Blackblade and was instead playing Dromar, the Banisher. Nice consolation present. I get a 5 land plus Graveborn Muse hand and keep it. Fugie dances around a bit with Volrath's Stronghold plus Shriekmaw (turns out that's good) while Major Luck drops Douse. This is actually a really good way to convince the BR player to focus his attention on you. The Major was spinning his Top and shuffling a lot, but had no board presence. I was peacefully drawing my 2 cards a turn. Fugie drops Jace, Ajani, Lilliana and Platinum Angel. I'd be worried about Platz if every other card in my deck wasn't an answer for it. Basically, what I am trying to say is... I was ahead.

(5)Fugie Vamps for something. He flashes it to TooSarcastic. I'm worried. What does he think could blow me out here? TS smiles and says, "That's not gonna help." I have no idea what the guys put me on here, but it was pretty clear I had something "amazing", which is to say, amazing to Timmy. Fugie passes the turn.

(6)So I am sitting there wondering how to get Major Luck to tap down, so I can force Jokulhaups through the Douse. Fugie is having us draw an extra card...Nevinyrral's disk! Ding.

(7)"You realize Disk is about to untap, right?" says Fugie to a very aware Major Luck. Luckie considers his options, then transmutes Drift of Phantasms? 3! What's at 3? Am I about to be blown out? Capsize! On the Disk! Major has 7 mana up. He can't buyback and leave mana up for the Douse. And I am thinking to myself, "How the hell do I convince him to buyback without being obvious about it?" Thank heavens for TS, who provided just enough, "oh shit, you're screwed," commentary, that I didn't have to lay it on too thick. I picked up the card, squinted at it and said, "It has buyback?" Major Luck taps 6. Oh man...

(8)I drew something. Tapped 12 mana. Jokulhaups. Luckie spins the top with it on the stack, saves the Top. Fugie bins everything but Jace and Lilliana (Ajani had died somehow). I floated BBBRRR. When I finished my ridiculous windmill slam, I revealed Rakdos the Defiler. Fugie has to find an answer, now.

(9)We start discussing Unsummon. "If somebody has an answer to that, I applaud them, because that would be an awesome comeback." I say. Now that my heart has stopped racing, I've got the fear. What if they do have a one mana answer? Like Unsummon? Or something? I'm never very good at thinking of all the cards. Lilliana is on 6. Fugie takes her to 7 and I pitch something I'd never be able to cast. Major Luck fails to drop a land

(10)Fugie kindly explains to me how Lilliana can't go up to 8 and then Living Death in the same turn. Oh right. I guess I will hit you again Fuge.

(11)Fugie draws for the turn. We all draw off Jace. Lilliana goes to 8. Major Luck again fails to drop a land. I hit Lilliana down to 1. Major Luck misses another land drop. I hit Fugie and he scoops and...

(12)...goes through his deck and flashes the Swords to Plowshares that he was desperately trying to topdeck.

The Swords to Plowshares he had the land to play.

The Swords to Plowshares he could have Demonic Tutored for with Lilliana.

The Swords to Plowshares he could have drawn with Jace after D-tutoring with Lilliana. CBG dodges a bullet.

Man, that was fun. Finishing off Major Luck was academic. I bathed in glory. It was AWESOME.

3 comments:

TooSarcastic said...

I'll pick up my Oscar later, CBG. You're welcome!
I thought you would dwell more on how painful it was for Fugie to have to bin permanent after permanant from being being hit with the Defiler. Also, having the windmill slam come first in your recounting makes this confoosing to anyone who was not there. In case there was any misunderstanding, CBG ran around the room and windmill slammed Rakdos the Defiler, people. The correct answer is Rakdos the Defiler.

Matt said...

What did he Vamp for?

Defender in Exile said...

Cock.