Chicago Regionals 2008!

What up fools? Well, Regionals 2008 is now behind us. And what fun it was! I was planning on doing some sort of exhaustive tourney report, but then I would need to explain why I went 4-4-1. Instead I will just lay it out for you; I don't normally play Standard, I play tested for about a total of four hours prior to showing up, and most all, I am bad at Magics. There you go.



Let's start with some photos. I hear people love the multimediaz. Thanks to Captain Bondage Goth for the ride down and the help taking these pics.

It's me, TooSarcastic, smiling gaily as I flaunt one of the pretty Faeries that will soon be merrily prancing into the red zone. Uh, actually I think that's a Mutavault.

Tabasco Tony here.

He piloted G/B Elves to a winning record, I believe. More about Hot Sauce and his Garruk exploits later.

The Captain.

Apparently he plays Limited, Vintage, AND Standard. Don't even get me started about the man's EDH decks.

Pseudonymous Drama Student. He played an awesome Zur deck that fetched all sorts of silver bullet enchantments. Rogue, I tells ya, rogue!

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A Milwaukee native did actually make it in to Top 8. Harry Potter, young wizard and student at an all boys high school (Ha!) slid into 8th place playing G/B Elves to an astounding record of 7-1-1. Good form! He tweaked the maindeck to include the full quad of Garruks, going down to 3x Chameleon Colossus, and also chose basic Swamp over the fancier Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth. There were definitely more Elves running around than at PT Hollywood. I don't know if he anticipated more mirror matches instead of Faerie matchups, but I think both changes helped him, since Garruk is a dog to the Fae, but is quite nice in the mirror. Maybe our young friend also got some advantage from his opponent's Urborgs while avoiding the dreaded "Wasteland your Legendary land" moment, I don't know. I'd like to have seen his sideboard, but didn't get the chance. I don't know if he got the Nationals Invite (it was very late and The Captain, Tabasco and I couldn't stay to watch the rubber match). Wizard's site doesn't yet say, and neither does the Pastimes website. If someone knows of young Potter's fate, comment.

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Here's the quick and dirty of my less-than-glamorous Regionals. I promise I'll make it as painless as possible.

Round 1: Quick n' Toast. Draw. He played very slowly, and was nervous, but I saw soooo many Kitchen Finks and Firespouts. I hear they aren't good for little blue men.

Round 2: R/G Big Mana. He is also super slow (and I am not a fast player either) and I get game three on turn five after time is called. More Firespouts/Finks!

Round 3: Reveilark combo, sort of. Got there in two games. He did play a Red Akroma against me in game 2. That was scary, because I didn't have Terror in hand. He swung, I flashed in a Scion of Oona and blocked with three black Bitterblossom tokens. He didn't have the removal for my Scion, but he did pump his Akroma to 10/6, so I took 4, but got rid of the angry Angel. Let's say I didn't expect to be playing against THAT card this weekend.

Round 4: Faeries. I lose 0-2. I did not test the mirror matchup and played like ass in both games, but really the games were over turn 2. The first game I ran out a turn two Bitterblossom on the draw- right into his Rune Snag. Genius. And game 2 I play first, end up ripping an Ancestral Vision off the top turn 2, and suspend it instead of leaving Rune Snag mana up. Yep, his turn 2= Bitterblossom. GG.

Round 5: G/B Elves. Got there in 3, mostly because I drew 4 Damnations total between the post sideboard games.

Round 6: Zvi's Deus of Calamity G/R deck. I go on tilt from here on out. Although I'm not sure what exactly I am supposed to do about turn 2 Magus of the Moon. It's bad news when you die before your turn 1 Ancestral Visions unsuspends. She plays turn 1 Llanowar Elves, turn 2 Magus, turn 3 Chameleon Colossus, turn 4 Chameleon Colossus, turn 5 kill me. Game 2 I should have sided in Damnations instead of Thoughtseize. I didn't. I lost, even though I forced the Magus of the Moon to get discarded turn one, because Deus + Countryside Crusher = better than my Razormane Masticore.

Round 7: G/B Elves. Lost in 2. I didn't draw Damnation post-board.

Round 8: G/B Elves. Lost in 2. This build was bizarre, with Wolf Skull Shamans. I should have gotten this one, but I made many mistakes because I am bad at Magic.

Round 9: I played a small child with what looked like a Block Constructed Kithkin deck. I don't know what's worse, beating up on a kid, or losing to one. I got there, 2-0. Woo Hoo, I guess.



I should have dropped at 3-2-1. But single elim drafts are so pricey, and nobody wanted to EDH. I guess I could have done coverage.

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MORE PICS!

Tabasco plays a G/W Elves deck. He literally spent six consecutive turns making a Beast token with Garruk to chump a Chameleon Colossus trying kill his planeswalker.

Here we see him about to win, with two Beast tokens, a Shriekmaw, Tarmogoyf and Garruk, still with one counter remaining. Tabasco used his Manlands to chump through the midgame until he out-drew his opponent late.

I don't know why I took so many pictures of Hot Sauce. Here he is facing an underage WI resident (who may not want to be named, I don't know), who is piloting Faeries. I think Faeries got there, but I don't know for certain.

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My best play of the tournament: Round 2 I found myself in the draw bracket against an opponent who needed to read all my cards. We went to time, after which a bunch of his friends came over to watch. Finally a judge arrives as well. I was at 12 with two Bitterblossoms and three tokens in play. He was at 20 life, with some Elves in play. This is how it goes down:

Turn 0: On his upkeep I cast Mistbind Clique as time is called. He thinks for a long time, taps his land and says, "You got it." I champion a token. He draws his cards and passes.

Turn 1: My turn I beat with the Clique and two Bitterblossom tokens. He goes to 14.

Turn 2: On his upkeep, I cast Mistbind Clique, champion another token, and his friends groan. He thinks, swears, and then taps his lands. He draws his card and passes turn.

Turn 3: My turn I beat with both Cliques and three Bitterblossom tokens. He goes to 3.

Turn 4: On his upkeep, I stop him and say, "Hold on." He shouts "Fucking A!" and his friends yell profanities. Then I say, "Dude, I was just fucking with you. I don't have the third Clique. Go to draw step?" That got a laugh from everyone, even the judge. Yeah, I got the win on turn 5, but just watching him freak out at the thought of getting Timewalked for all his extra turns was the best thing that happened all day. He was a good sport, I probably would have been pissed off.

***

I got some good photos of Asshole Jason, who played a R/B token deck with Gargadon and Nantuko Husk, but I don't know if he would want me posting his mug online, so I won't. I'll leave you with a Magic: The Puzzling type situation. Asshole Jason's opponent is playing some kind of mono-black deck. This photo is shot from the opponent's perspective.

Yes those two lands facing the camera are Leechridden Swamps. The opponent also has a Bitterblossom, one token, one Demigod of Revenge (tapped, attacking) and six Snow-Covered Swamps. As you can see, he has only one card in hand. Now to Jason's side. He has two Faerie Macabre, two Kobold tokens, his own (shiny!) Demigod of Revenge, three Swamps, a Mountain, a Sulphurous Spring, and an untapped Kher Keep. If you squint you can see the life totals- Jason 4, his opponent 15. Jason's graveyard has; 2x Greater Gargadon, 2x Mogg War Marshal, a Mutavault, a Makeshift Mannequin, and a Nantuko Husk. Assume Jason has no hand. How does he win the game before those Leechridden Swamps kill him? I'll give you some space.

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Figured it out yet?

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Still no? That's because he fucking lost, suckers!

Ha!

T

A Miss Mosh of Topics

Lots of diverse topics to write about tonight; I'll get right going.

Cube Draft!
To expand or not to expand? That is the question. I have had a few votes in favor and one "meh" (who stated that he actually enjoyed culling the weakest Cube cards from the cardboard herd). I am sorta kinda against it, but not in any real substantive way. My only arguments are that 1) The completist in me loves to know that we will have a full pool of awesome cards when we have an 8 man Cube draft, and 2) The elitist in me likes knowing that only the very most powerful 360 cards are deemed worthy of such an honor. Changing the number upward is fine, most notably if it gets people engaged in the Cube process again, which has been lacking since the increase in the number of expert level expansion releases this year. Also, I need to actually bring it along to Magic nights. And then there's EDH to blame too. God damnnit is EDH fun. It just wrecks other formats. But I digress! Here are questions that need answering if we want to expand ze Kube.
1) How do we decide the number of cards to add to the Cube?
We can do arbitrary, i.e. 100, or another 360 (not recommended, super duper power level drop off alert), or 140 (because that's the number that after much deliberation we estimate will provide the most delicious add-ins without a significant power drop off); OR we can just start tossing in good cards until we have a consensus moment when we say "stop." This would be something like, "Well, Armored Ascension is good enough but we need to draw the line at Silkbind Faerie." Or something like that. I would argue for some iteration of the former, not the latter, lest mass chaos erupt.
2) How do we decide which CARDS to add to the Cube?
Sounds kind of "obv" worthy, right? But the biggest argument for increasing Cube size has come because of the large amount of rad ass uncommons of Shadowmoor. True, there are many awesome potential includes in Shadowmoor, but we have also cut dozens of cards prior to this. Are those rejects now getting a new lease on Cube life? What about cards that were in other Cube lists that we rejected during building? Are they now too in the running? I guess my point is that thousands of cards may be competing for a scant 100 or so slots. Are we up to the challenge? Or will we provide some guidelines going in, like new cards have priority, or that we are only adding Shadowmoor cards? I really do come down egalitarian side of every card having an equal chance here. If we are expanding the Cube then all those mint Shadowmoor cards should have to compete with the dusty also-rans of yore. The Cube is about distilled power level, whatever else it is about. Adding cards is one thing, but not allowing all cards consideration for entry is ageist. Yeah I went there.

Regionals!
I will apparently be there! I have not tested at all, but might try to do so Wednesday eve. I am running the consensus "best deck" (duhr Faeries, duhr) because let's face it; me+ type 2 + no testing = Hope to be Lucksack McGee or 0-2 drop and EDH. I am leaning to the latter more than the former, but at least Faeries can just win sometimes. Here is a list of cards I need, should you be so kind to loan them.

1x Faerie Conclave
1x Underground River
1x Mutavault
2x Pendelhaven
3x Razormane Masticore
3x Thoughtseize
3x Ancestral Vision

And any sideboard/maindeck tech against Chameleon Colossus/Squall Line/Cloudthresher, and/or Kitchen Finks, because they all scare the hell out of me. Makes me want to play more counterspells out of the board or something. Lookit me, all pretending to know about Standard and shit!

Big Changes with Shards of Alara!
I am still processing this, but off the cuff it seems like having what amounts to super-duper rares is not an idea I can really support. I already spend way more money on this stupid hobby than I should. The realization that no one really learns the game through the Core Set seems like an open secret finally being publicly acknowledged. How many people watching a Magic game for the first time see people playing Xth edition cards? And we know that's how newbs learn, from watching non-newbs play. I personally am happy to see the number of cards printed per year go down. Learning Limited formats takes time, and I feel like I never really got enough play out of Lor/Lor/Mor draft before the switch. I KNOW I won't have drafted trips Shadowmoor more than 15 times before the new rotation, mostly because of new time constraints on my part. I guess the real problem here is the Wizards needs to give us more time between set releases, not fewer cards per release. Yes Rav/Guild/Diss was boring by the end, but at least we had time to "figure out" the format. And that was a format that turned out to really give players a lot of enjoyment for doing so. Now only the super die-hard drafters are going to "get" the current format before it rotates. You hear that? I'm not enough of a Limited player to keep up anymore! What the hell is this world coming to?


Geekerus Miscellaneous!
Fans of Wizards of the Coast and their business interests should note that Dungeons and Dragons 4th edition will be in stores this weekend. Wizards is a crafty company, and have recruited several behemoths of webcomicry to inaugurate this occasion. Penny-Arcade's Gabe and Tycho (or Jerry and Mike) and PVP's Scott Kurtz have agreed to do an adventure DMed by a Wizards employee familiar with the new 4E rules. The result a series of podcasts and comic panels, drawn by Mike and Scott. Because all of these men are hilarious the experience is worth a listen even for those hypocrites who decry paper and pencil Geekery. D&D players will glean some knowledge of the new system and have an opportunity to hear how the system works in real time.

DJ TooSarcastic!
New mix is up. Tracklist here. It is dark. Not much melody up in here. I was inspired by the kind of music that I most enjoy dancing to; rhythm-heavy techno. I ended leaning toward progressive house vibe as well. I thought I gave that sound up in college, but apparently I was not well-informed. It was a really easy mix to make, two takes, a few edits and that was that. I am much more used to mixing music like this, since this was what I enjoyed playing when I used to have proper gigs. I put this into my Itunes and it appears to have compressed the volume or something such that one or two tracks sound pretty fucking awful. I promise that if you listen to the MP3 file on its own it won't sound as terrible.
T